Oh, where to begin. So many things annoyed Opinion Lady last year. Probably the number one thing on my list would be that no one listens to me! I could save people billions of dollars and help them avoid costly, embarrassing mistakes or bad career moves if they would consult me first.
Kim Kardashian-I would have told her, “Don’t do it. You are a materialistic empty soul who cares more about lip gloss and shoes than character. People will rebel if you hurt that poor guy, what’s-his-name.”
Demi Moore- I would have told her, “You have been blessed to have been with Ashton Kutcher this long. You knew that eventually, he would have to leave! He will always remember you fondly. Get him out of the house before he thinks about dating one of your kids. Ashton, you should have left before you cheated. Have some class.
Gwyneth Paltrow-You should have called me in 2010, when you decided to make the country music film and then do a concert tour. Let me give it to you straight, Gwen, you are gorgeous, talented, have money, an Academy Award, you were on Glee AND you are married to Chris Martin. ENOUGH. How much of the pie do you want? Save a little for the rest of us, damn it. Maybe WE want to sing country music, or have a food show where we go frolicking through Spain. No one likes a piggy pig who takes too much. Either give me Chris Martin and take your country music and Spanish food, or give something up. You need a dose of “real.” This is what I get paid for. (Or wish I did)
That Royal Wedding-The bride never called me (but should have!)because I would have declared the wedding dress BORING! I felt like the kid in the story "The Emperor has No Clothes." No one else wanted to say it. The dress was "Yawn." AND I declare the wedding "one of the best nap times I had last year."
Opinion Lady doesn’t want to end on a sour note. Many things did not annoy me. Glee; Anderson Cooper; Ellen; The Twilight movie; and Brian Greene’s Nova specials to name just a few. However, I am still annoyed that Oprah is gone.
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