I think the solar eclipse that we experienced this past August 21 somehow re-adjusted our Earthly calendar because why else would Christmas be coming so early this year? That’s sarcasm of course because I KNOW it wasn’t the eclipse’s fault but how else do you explain the determination by the RETAIL MONSTER to force the holiday season onto the public even earlier than ever? The holidays are obviously coming sooner this year because I have witnessed holiday merchandise in the stores BEFORE HALLOWEEN. What happened to the unwritten rule of “after Thanksgiving?”
This is egregious on so many levels, but let’s first start with how unjust it is to Halloween and Thanksgiving! Halloween had to share the retail space with “The Holidays” this year and that doesn’t seem fair. Remember Thanksgiving? This year we are just plowing over that holiday and sliding into Christmas and Hanukah. If I were the PR rep for Thanksgiving why I would be in litigation right now. By this new calendar, we should be celebrating New Year’s Eve sometime in early December.
I refuse to be bullied by the Retail Monster. In the words of every five year old I have ever known…”You’re not the boss of me!” I am not letting you tell me what to buy or what to think or when I should start listening to Christmas music on the radio. (I recommend no sooner than 10 days before the holiday!) I’m not letting you tell me what the “10 best holiday gifts” are in your opinion. I think I know the people I buy gifts for a little better than you.
The Retail Monster’s biggest day is definitely the Super Bowl of Revolting Consumerism – Black Friday. I actually stay home on that day. Black Friday is not the boss of me, either.
I say we slow things down a bit. Give every day its due, enjoy each sunrise and sunset, relish each holiday and give it time to shine in Walmart’s center aisle and STOP RUSHING ME, damn it!
